Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Money Haemorrhage

Money just seems to pour out of my pockets in Sydney. I swear if I turned around fast enough I would see a trail of banknotes wafting out behind me, like autumn leaves rocking gently to earth.

The purpose of our trip was to visit the miracle naturopath, Amanda was disconcertingly beautiful, with glowing skin and healthy lips and eyes, exuding positivity and concern. She divested us of $600 in our quest for youthful fertile ovaries – breathtaking I know, but cheaper than IVF, I kept telling myself.

I have a long list of toxic substances that are now banned from my diet – sugar and caffeine and alcohol, all the usual suspects, as well as all fats & oils except for olive, flaxseed & sesame, and the killer, a drastic reduction in refined carbohydrates – pasta and yummy soft fresh yeasty bread. I also have a large bag of pills and potions – I think I need to get a dosette box, a little box elderly or confused people get from the chemist to dispense their medications – I have zinc and magnesium and fish oil and a bitter herb drink and a protein supplement and radiation drops to counteract the effects of all this flying. Apparently flying is really bad for fertility – Amanda said she sees lots of air hosties and pilots. And that pilots die really young, like 55 or something, because of the radiation. I’m going to have to look that up.

We also managed some cultural things – blew a lot of money going to see Dusty the musical. I didn’t realise it was a musical about LESBIANS! There was Dusty and her girlfriend singing about their tragic breakup. I’ve certainly seen better musicals – more rousing and inspirational – but it was a fun night out, going into the city in all our finery.

We stayed with my sister-in-law, Lovergirl's sister. Lovergirl’s nephew Tim, who’s five, was being a bit of a brat this weekend. We don’t see him often and the other times I’ve met him he’s been a sweetie. This weekend he had something going on and was determined to oppose everything that was going on. Good experience for me to see the really annoying, grinding side to being a parent. I really don't have a lot of patience for it! Maybe I'm a short tempered crabby old spinster woman who can't cope with the realities of kids?

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